Adoption
Kate comes to Kansas

By Kelly McCarthy Rettig and Michael Rettig

　　On the morning of June 4, 2000, we stepped into another world.

　　We had arrived in China to adopt our daughter Kate Li Rettig. She was given the birth date of July 15, 1999, and was born in or near Chengdu City in Sichuan Province. This little girl, named TuYa Li, didn't realize how her life would soon change. It would become a whole new world for all of us.
　　We arrived in Guangzhou after a 15-hour nonstop flight from Los Angeles with three other families traveling from another state.We spent the morning sightseeing in Guangzhou City. It was a humid day with a sunny forecast after days of rain. We heard often that we had brought the sunshine with us. We were told it was a blessing of good fortune, especially on the day we were to be united with our daughter.
　　After a full morning and early afternoon, we flew to Chengdu City. Everything seemed very crowded and unfamiliar, but with the support of our guides we made it to our hotel without any problems. Our agency from the States assisted us with the adoption paperwork, made all the travel arrangements and secured quality guides.We traveled around the city by bus with our guides never far from us and stayed at a hotel with western amenities. We took precautions, eating only cooked food and drinking only bottled water.
　　At approximately 8:30 p.m., the orphanage staff was to bring the babies to our hotel.The lobby had become a maternity waiting room with eight expectant families pacing back and forth anxiously.
　　We had received digital pictures of Kate in March in addition to the referral picture but it was still hard to know who was who when all the babies arrived. It was loud and chaotic with babies crying, confusion brought on by translation and everyone talking at once. With our pictures in hand and our documents complete, we were able to determine which baby was ours. TuYa Li was 11 months old when they handed her to Kelly. Her hair had been shaved and she had a white powder all over her head. She was wearing some simple baby clothes fashioned into split-pants. She was small and quiet. We were all overwhelmed with joy. There were many tears and lots of pictures.
　　When we finally got back to our hotel room, Kate realized that something was very different. She cried for nearly two hours.We had expected her to take a bottle, but she didn't want it. We fretted over her, loved her, held her and tried to get her to eat and drink. It was some time before we figured out that she would take food from a spoon and drink from a sipping cup. We were amazed that at 11 months her eating skills were so advanced and relieved that she was no longer hungry. We had also discovered that Kate sucked her thumb, a habit that continues to this day.
　　The next day was busy with shopping and paperwork formalities — like taking family pictures for our travel documents.
　　We had thought that the Chinese people might resent our adopting a child from their country. This was not the case at all. People were generally quite curious about us and were genuinely happy for us and for Kate.Many people approached us and conveyed to us that they thought she was very lucky baby.We always graciously accepted, and we reassured them how blessed and lucky we felt. In our tours we were exposed to a very old culture including the arts, music, foods, temples and history.
　　For the next few days we developed a routine: paperwork, meeting with various Chinese officials to finalize the adoption and going to restaurants, touring or shopping.
　　On the third day, we visited the Kate's orphanage. It was also a school for children with disabilities, and we were able to visit some of the classrooms. Sadly we were unable to see where the babies were kept but were reassured that they were well cared for. It was not a personable visit by any means, but interesting to say the least. While there each family paid the orphanage $3,000 and left gifts for the care providers and babies.
　　Unfortunately, Michael needed to get back to the States for summer school. After a week in China, he flew home alone — with a stomach ailment. Kelly and Kate left the next day with the other families to go back to Guangzhou and the U.S. Consulate to finalize the adoption and get travel visas.
　　This left Kelly with the task of bringing Kate back by herself. But it wasn't as daunting as it might have been, because the families that had made the trip with us — people we had grown close to — pitched in and provided Kelly with needed breaks and support to get through those last days in China. Twelve days after arriving in China, Kelly and Kate began their trip home, first flying with the other families to Los Angeles and then finishing the last leg on their own.
　　The majority of children adopted from China are young girls. The younger children often show some developmental delays, especially in motor skills, just like Kate. But these delays are minor and easily overcome. For example, within three months of her arrival in the States, Kate quickly went from not sitting up independently to pulling up, scooting and crawling. Many of the children, in fact appear to have very positive outcomes.